Sigh...I promised myself I would write more in college, but that has clearly been a negative. It's been a while since I last sat down at my computer, thought about my life, and wrote about it.

Anyways, back to the point of this post - freshman year is done. College is a quarter done. The transition is over - from the dream-filled high schooler to the indolent college student. Haha, yes, I am using the word "indolent" to describe myself right now. When I look back to freshman year, I was rather lazy with my school work and obligations. But I wanted a break, and it was good to have one for a while (although my GPA suffered a bit...oh dear!). However, as lazy as I was, I learned a lot this year: from my classes, people I met, and experiences I had. And here are a few for now (I'll add more later):

1. There is No Such Thing as a Free Lunch (for those of you unfamiliar with the phrase here is an explanation and origin http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/tanstaafl.html) - oh dear, why do I have to start with such an obvious one? Of course there's no such thing as a free lunch. Duh! But my experience here at college has reiterated this point for me. Gone are the days where I don't have to work to get something! Sigh, which leads me to think: I have always taken good education for granted. Ever since I was little, I've always had good teachers (minus a few, but I don't remember the bad ones). In my life, the people who have inspired me the most have been my teachers, and the joy that I have had learning from them has been countless! And I came here under the impression that college would be a massive intellectual party. Not to say I haven't been intellectual here, but I do miss the willingness of my teachers to be my mentors, my coaches, and my friends. So how does this tie into "There is No Such Thing as a Free Lunch?" Well, I've learned this year, that there is no such thing as a free education, and that my whole life the reason why I've always had such amazing teachers was because my parents were willing to always shell out numbers that had four zeros attached to them to support me. I feel grateful, but at the same time feel disgruntled that education must be categorized with any other consumer good out there, and that you can flash it like a designer brand. That the words "Harvard," "Yale," and "Princeton" can make you all the more sought after and all the more coveted just like a Gucci or Louis Vuitton bag does. But now that I am here in college, I really disagree with that mentality. Why should a name separate the "educational status quo" that students are placed into by societal recognition? And this leads to my second lesson I learned...

2. "C'est le personnage, pas la caractère." When I took French, back in high school, one of the common mistakes that I made was that I always forgot to distinguish between the words "personnage" and "caractère" while writing an essay (for those of who are confused: a personnage is a character in a movie or a book, a caractère is describing the personality, the thoughts, and the actions of an individual. So in a sense, "un personnage" is describing the outside features of a person, while "une caractère" is describing the inner features of a person). This is another one of those dumb "duh, you obviously learned this before coming to college, why are you repeating it?" I guess college has reaffirmed a lot of the lessons I learned in high school, which makes their presence in my life a lot greater. Anyways, I have met so many interesting and diverse people here! A lot of you have broken many generalizations that I used to have. I became such a judgmental person in high school, and only recently have I found that out. And to think that the quiet guy in the corner of my math class who always gets the good grades is actually a married 24 year old who messed around with drugs, sex, and alcohol when he was my age! Wow. Talk about the difference between caractère and personnage. So, second lesson I've learned: talk to people. Ask them about their lives. Because they are more interesting than you think!

3. It's Nothing Personal, It's Just Business. Oh the experiences I've had with this one! Some of you know what I'm talking about (:wink: at my Anchord buddies). But to be a part of all that drama and havoc was actually quite educative. I learned so much about personalities, how people intereact with each other, the qualities a leader should have, and the role of an individual in a governing system. Back in high school, there was so much drama everywhere. After four years of that mess, I was rather annoyed by it (lol rather might not be the right word, maybe I'll try VERY). When I graduated, I was so glad I got out of it. Haha, but I tricked myself into thinking college would be all smiles and hugs. We will always be in drama - what else is going to complement our affinity towards conflict? Looking back towards the Bias Incident, Anchord, and Metcalf Hall, it's clear that Tufts students (as well as a lot of college students in this world) love to stir things up. But are things always that personal, and should we always make everything such a big deal? Don Corleone obviously diagrees. And I think I do too.

4. Don't be afraid you're life will end; be afraid that it will never begin. The wise words of Grace Hansen. Jim actually told me this - Jim is a person I met during the New Orleans trip I took with Tufts this year. I was in his work group, and I loved hearing him talk: from his life story, to his thoughts on life, and to the idioms he used (boy did he talk a lot). Anyways, since I've come to college, I've been hesitant to do a lot of things, because I'm scared of rejection or I think I'm not good enough for something. However, now that I think back on everything, that's not the case. To borrow the mantra from my freshman year roommate, "just doing it" will take you to unexpected places. And if you end up somewhere you didn't expect yourself going, here's a reminder from Frou Frou, "'cos there's beauty in the breakdown." So fourth lesson I've learned: explore more, go places, do things, be confident in your curiosity and passions, and never think you're going to reach a dead end because there are none.

5. God Moves in Mysterious Ways. William Cowper wrote this poem and published it in 1779 as a hymn. The ironic thing about my experience at this uber-liberal, god-forsaken campus, is that I've grown closer to Him and learned so much about the way God works here. And to sum up all I've learned spiritually in one word, I've learned a lot about "waiting." I've learned to be independant since I was 13, and being used to making my own decisions has led me to become impatient with people who don't meet my demands immediately. But no one works on the same schedule, and to expect God to satisfy our every need at the exact time we want it is ridiculous and rather selfish. And to close this post with my fifth lesson: "Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him" (Psalm 37:7a).

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